4/03/2006

Life with mEnTaL IlLnEsS

Have you ever just stopped doing something....right in it's tracks...just to think...what the hell is the matter with me?

Yesterday was a day long of chores. My moment was vacuuming trying to get that string off the floor. You all know "that string" we have all had one. I used the vaccume to no avail, the string just sticks to the floor. I roll over it again for it to move two inches upward on the carpet, then 2 inches backward as I roll back. Then I am pissed so I roll it back and forth back and forth back and forth really fast. At this point I have whacked the vaccume into a wall and my kids are watching now as I am cursing under my breath and growling. I am not going to pick up a freggin string. Finally my son comes to my rescue, walks over, and picks up the string, giving me a sideway glance, letting me know that I lost. This was my moment of mental illness.


My children decided that they were going to be mentally challenged this weekend as well. I went to the store for 45 minutes and came home. As I am approaching my home I see a neighbor in his car talking in his car pointing at my house. I'm thinking great...the house is on fire. Then I see it. My sons decided that the easiest and most 'fun' way to take the TV out of their sisters room without her knowing it (as she was in another room) was to go out the window. Creative yes...dumb? Absolutely.

The neighbors were looking at my sons ass sticking out the window, and him holding a TV. It looked as though someone was breaking and entering. I was waiting for the cops to show up, as we have a very strict neighborhood watch, and homeowners association. I truly was expecting it as last month my son took his basketball hoop out to the curb and that is not allowed, so one of the other homeowners actually snapped a picture, ans sent a warning letter that if this were ever to happen again, that we would be fined.

To prove my point that mental illness does run in families, my favorite story is of my very blonde daughter. I was out one evening with a new cell phone that was not working properly. She was trying to call and could not get though so she thinks she should call 411 and get the number, since I did not leave it, knowing I always answer my cell. When I came home that evening she tells me the story of not being able to find the number. After being assured everything was ok, they just wanted to know if they could eat all the pizza, I asked what happened to her calling information, that I never got a call. She said that she could not remember the number to 411.

I have never laughed so hard in my life.

This tops it all:)


Almighty Heidi and her not so right kids:)