The Wind

 Hi..yeah Im still alive. Felt the need to write today!

This is kind of sappy, but Im playing around with some digital art. Its the loss of someone you love. I thought about it as it is Thanksgiving eve and for many, holidays can be painful.  Might play around with the words some more cause I just wrote it in the past few minutes :) I will hate it in 2 hours.

I am in the wind,
In the rain, the laughter of a child,
The butterfly on the windowsill.
Beside you on the warm sunset
I have not left you
Look up,
I am in the stars
Shining light in the darkest places
Reminding you
I am still here.
When you smell my perfume
Or have a memory of me
Know it is I who is letting you know
I am ok
Open the ears of your soul and
You can hear me
Your mind and you can see me
I am in the wind….



~Almighty Heidi

Shooting Stars

I turned my world around for you

And you for me

Just a fleeting moment of gravity

just like every shooting star that goes by

It shines and sparkles as she flies

Her path is not to end

But to keep passing

why

Eyes hurting to see the traces of light left behind

Until they are gone

And my universe

Darkens

Just as it had been before

It Just Is

Hello fellow bloggers. Just a note to say the Almighty Heidi Lives. I look back on my blog from 2010 a dream I had for that new year..it had a lion in it that symbolized courage. I had no idea how much I would need that courage for following year..and year after that.

This past week I left my job, my security in these hard economic times. It was a leap of faith that had to be done. I had ate my humble pie for 2 years. I had to go back to waiting on tables and bartending to feed my family.

But my soul ached everyday to get out.
There was so much negative,
I could no longer see the positive around me any longer.
I longed to breathe.
I might have to eat some more humble pie
but at a new job it might just taste better.

Did I tell you I am going back to school full time with a heafty loan that I might not ever repay, but a 4.0 gpa?

I knew when it turned 2012 I would have a new job by my birthday.

Tommorrow is my birthday.

So this year, my year...
I choose not to live in darkenss of fear
but in the light of the unknown

I will always hunger for more
it is who I am
even though I still dont know who I am meant to be yet
but I know feel the drive twoards a purpose
every single day


Though I am sensitive, fragile of heart, and hurt easily
in reality I am tough, determined, and strong


I think I can,
and I have
or damn it
I will.

When my soul screams ENOUGH
then it is time
to move in another direction
because she has never steared me wrong

There is no failure
just a lesson
a stupid lesson that somehow
you needed to be reminded
of your own humanity
and to be sensitive to others
because they are only human too


get back up and keep moving
ther longer you stay down
the longer it takes to get back up

Dont be afraid of the dark
there are no monsters in the closet
that you have not already faced
Just turn on the damn light of your own soul


and know looking back
you will say
"I would not have changed a thing"
because it just is meant to be
It just is

Almighty Heidi

Before The Sun Goes Down

I have been lost for awhile..not writing, but felt inspired today, by a song, or a poem..whatever you want it to be

Keeping your heart close to mine

Love changes everything

this mess

Im trying my best

praying to the angels

to break down your walls

forget about our feelings

Im climbing over them

Words can never show

what Im about to do

Keep your heart close

love changed everything

this mess

trying our best

Fists against the wall

breaking it all

climbing the brokeness

tired and bruised

reaching out for you

begging to grab on

before the sun goes down

love changes everything

this mess

trying your best

stumbling in the dark

coming to rescue you

falling down

now its time

to know

the bricks

were always

mine

You keep my heart close
love does not change a thing

its not a mess

just a test

you prayed to the angels

to break down my walls

forget about hurt feelings

your climbing over them

Words can never show

what your about to do

tired and bruised

you come and rescue me.

~AlmightyHeidi

Look At The Stars

My soul aches

for things lost

for things found

It is really bittersweet,

the heaviness of today

the light of tommorrow,

but when the world slows down..

I look at the stars

Wanting more

breathing more

feeling more

I know it is there

all in the ache

of needing

you.


~Almighty Heidi

Lust

Definition:

"Pleasure, delight, wish, intense desire, intense longing, craving, enthusiasm, eagerness."

When I was younger, I was taught, that Lust was bad. Why..because the bible told me so. God himself says that is wrong.."Walk by the spirit and you will not gratify the desires of the flesh"

It was almost like to be happy with what you were given..don't complain or your just ungrateful...so..I always tried real hard to be happy with where I was at.

Well who wants to not be gratified?

Well…
My spirit…

not the god of my childhood

says…

You are not bad because you want more

Wishing is magic
And magic is OK

Especially when it comes true.

Hoping, craving, wanting better for yourself and your family

is part of being human.

When you stop hoping, craving, wanting better,

Your spirit dies

So go ahead

Make a wish

Hope for a better future

Delight in today

Desire more, crave more,

and always long…

for something

anything

Know when the things that you hope for come true

It is what the real god wanted for you all along.

Almighty Heidi

Vision

Putting on foot in front of the other

the next step

in the timeline of my life

Mind blurring with the past

full of misdirection

The universe pushing me forth

against my will

like the birth of a child

screaming when she gets her first breath of air

in fear of the unknown

Forced to put one foot in front of the other

pitch black

seeing nothing

not knowing

up or down

left of right

my soul

telling me to follow my heart.

~Almighty Heidi