The Alien Child

I was reading one of my favorite blogs now written by a kid in Chicago: http://thecasualfriday.blogspot.com/ he speaks of his life yet again saved by living inland, and having the threat of being eaten by a shark in Florida on one of his "highlights"Which brings me to my next blogging adventure,

When a man has pity on all living creatures then only is he noble.The Buddha (6th cent BCE).

My son was "double dog dared" in summer camp to eat an ant. In Florida, it is not just an ant. We have the meanest biggest horrible fire ants that god could possibly create. He was also offered 5 dollars so of course he had to accept the dare, and the money.
Needless to say the ant bit him hard on the tongue and my son suffered some excruciating pain of Friday. It is now Monday and his tongue still burns.
Would I have done this...Umm...yeah, seeing as Becky across the street in third grade dared me to stick my tongue to her freezer door and I ripped off three layers of skin.

Also in Florida we do have big giant gators which rule the ponds and lakes. People water ski regularly here...I tried once, and a fish brushed across my leg and I screemed bloody murder to get out of the water, swearing it was a 20 ft. Gator coming to eat me for lunch. NEVER AGAIN!

I do not have pity on the living creatures in Florida. We have the biggest cockroaches known to the living man. We have mosquitoes that pass on viruses, and sharks that love dangling legs on boogie boards.

If you can fathom this, Florida ia a great place to live regardless. Just have a big can of RAID handy!


The Everglades said...

When people head out to the ocean on a boogie borad they are thinking, "eh, the worst that'll happen is my nipples get chafed from the grip tape and salt water."

And then they are shark food.*


*I posted this same comment at The Casual Friday, which is how I found you (I thought your comment was funny). And I felt it was true with regards to your blog, because you actually mention boogie boards. I'm lame for cutting and pasting, I know, but at least I found your blog!

Dreams said...

good work..Almighty Heidi of course ......check my blog..http://measis.blogspot.com/...if possible.

Gone Away said...

Oooh, now that's waxing poetic, sweetie! Who said my daughter isn't the next best thing to Billy Collins in the poetry department? (Creative bones? Heck, its in the DNA. And Michael, your precocious 9 year old stand-up comic -- now we know -- he got it all from you :^D). When he first uttered his first seemingly unintelligeble words, he was poking fun at your spelling. He told me today his first memory was laying in your lap while trying to decipher the Dear John letter you were writing to his father -- the one where you notified him about the impending divorce.