Where did the Almighty Heidi go? Simple..the aliens took me on a little sabbatical journey and now I am back cynical as ever. ..and of course, let’s not forget the male bashing 101 series that has just been boiling with brand new stories.
So for my next long awited story will start from square one, left brain vs. right brain.
Men are used to only using one brain, Ok, we all know about him using the one that is covered by a zipper on the lower part of his…region, but it is proven that he uses, most of the time dominantly the right side of the brain. While women…yes women use both. The right spatial part of the brain is where they learn visually not verbally.…aim and shoot…football, baseball, any ball, and video games etc… and sometimes even solving problems. When you say “Honey we need to talk” and it does not sink in, this is why:The left side of the brain is used for verbal skills. Men have to cross way over to the other side of the brain and this is too much work, like getting up to get the remote control off the coffee table when they are inches away on the couch.
Also it is proven hooking up both men and woman to a functional MRI, that while men are playing video games, that the reward center in their brain glows bright colors. While the woman’s reward center stays dim. We don’t get it. Women don’t get the reward pleasure of playing ridiculous games ALL DAY LONG FOR HOURS. We are able to flip over to the left side and say this is dumb, will I get anything accomplished by going to the next level? Absolutely not. Pretend game money means nothing…but don’t tell my son that, he will argue with you all day…the only verbal skills he knows, because after all he is male, and he is always right.
So moral of the story is while playing any kind of game form men….which involves the right side of the brain, reward central is going on.
Perfect example is my youngest son. I was a single mom potty training him, and I could try and TELL him how to aim (although, I did not have much of a clue how you all control that thing, most THINGS I met did not have much control anyway …made myself laugh). I finally got an idea to throw a few cheerios in the toilet since they floated, and told him to aim try and shoot the cheerios. After this experiment all was well in the potty arena. It was not so much the verbal directions that never did any good anyway, it was the spatial ability…aim and shoot…and of course the reward center is yelling Saying “ Yay, you peed on the cheerios! Do it again do it again.”
Perhaps the key to getting housework done is a reward center oriented game. If I put an actual basketball hoop over the washing machine perhaps clothes will automatically fall into there. Maybe if I had a button I could ring everytime something was picked up the floor saying “You are the man, you are awesome and there is no one on this planet like you” Things would be picked up more often. Maybe if I made up invisible money and if you do so many chores you automatically get to go up to the next level and get to put cool things on your pretend car….Ok maybe not, maybe all this time, with a grown man and two boys in the house, to keep pee off the toilet seat I should stick to keeping a box of cheerios in the bathroom.