Figuring out the aliens in my head...

The last few days have been absolute pure relaxation..and I have slept, which is huge!! The kids have been with grandparents or parents, so there has been no responsibility, which has been nice. I have been thinking about my New Years resolutions..have not made a list yet...but have thought about a few things.

There are so many things coming at me, expected and unexpected, and my own emotions have done nothing but suprise me. A bunch of Alien emotions and actions that I am confused by. I thought I had me all figured out. Damn....

On another note....this is actually kind of funny..and sad, but heck I will share. About 4 months ago I asked B why..welll..why we didn't Bow chickie wow wow anymore...ha! And his response was that I had gained weight and it just was not the same.

To all you guys out there..if your signifigant other has 3 back surgeries, and can no longer run the 5k,,you might wanna cut her a little slack...not to mention...did I say THREE surgeries, about 10 epidurals full of f'ing steroids.....

1. I am NOT fat...however this crushed any self esteem I had left, and....well the final straw to any relationship that we had left. Hahahah i am leaving you..you selfish son of a bitch.

2. Fuck you.

I think that about says it, so for christmas he gives me a gym membership......My boss and close friend wanted to punch him in the nose.

Well, I am looking forward to going to the gym, I am sooo sick of the treadmill downstairs...but please refer back to #1 and#2.

The craziest emotion of all..is the more I dont want love in my life, the more i want it. Grrrrr.
Stupid humanity....stupid emotions. Damn.

That is it for now....



foam said...

hey! i get first dibs in punching him in the nose and someplace else too ..

X. Dell said...

As to your bulleted points.

(1) I've only seen facial shots of you, and from when I don't know. So I cannot determine your weight or shape. Still, your face is beautiful. But most important: whatever you look like, you're still the Almighty Heidi. That's gotta measure pretty high on the Va Va Voom scale.

(2) I'd be happy to. But let's see if you can work out this relationship first. I'd recommend that he ditch the sensetivity training. Instead, get him a membership to a mind gym....so he can work the fat out of his head.

MaQuade said...

The more you don't want love, the more you want it.

Wanting out weighs not-wanting any day.

And with that bit of wisdom, I declare myself once again AMAP!

Love wins in the end.

AlmightyHeidi said...

Dell: Nope..not fat. he was just used to me being a size 2 runner..and this ol relationship is done. I made up my mind pretty firmly on this. I have tried for the past 4 years or so to make it work...and belieive it or not..I am taking a sigh of releif to move forward.
Maquade: You are a sick die hard romantic...i think i'm gonna be sick. ;)

X. Dell said...

I can only wish you better luck next time.