3/23/2009

Health


After batteling the flu for a very long week, I feel so blessed that I have my health. I am so thankful NOT to be chronically ill. I was in Chronic every day pain for three years with my back. Those days are so foggy, and ugly, I would not wish that on anyone.

So today I am celebrating my health espcially after starting the contest at work...and stepping on the scale. I wanted to scream...cry...rock in the fetal position under my desk..and grab the nearest captain morgan...but no...

It was a first step in....self dicipline..something I am not good at.

I did go to the gym.

Good girl. I get brownie points..without the brownie of course.

12 weeks of competion begin today. *YAY* summertime bathing suit...I will see you soon my friend...dont dissapoint me!!
So here is a list I sent my co-workers to encourgage them to join my competition (which I of course being THE Almighty Heidi will win)
I figured I would throw in the benefits of working out.

Regular exercise can...
-Help you lose weight, especially fat …like my muffin top.

-Improve your physical appearance …improves the HOTNESS factor

-Increase your level of muscular strength and endurance Women love endurance

-Maintain your resting metabolic rate to prevent weight gain …losing weight while doing nothing…nice…Bruce thinks he can do this.

-Increase your stamina and ability to do continuous work Women love stamina too...hell yeah

-Improve fitness levels, or your body's ability to use oxygen ..Last I heard we all need oxygen

-Provide protection against injury …Just take a peek at my scar…good thing I did not get a tramp stamp.

-Improve your balance and coordination …this personally will never happen for me...EVER.

-Increase bone mineral density to prevent osteoporosis …who wants a hump back?? Not me.

-Lower resting heart rate and blood pressure ….Ommmmm...

-Lower Body Mass Index (BMI), your fat to height ratio thank god for being 5’9m however…it’s no longer disguising the muffin top

-Reduce triglycerides, bad cholesterol (LDL), raises good cholesterol (HDL)

-Enhance sexual desire and performance Oh hell yeah…not that I would know, but..umm hell yeah

-Reduce heart disease risk and stroke Cause noone likes looking at you drooling out of the left side of your face, and crapping your pants cause you have no control.

-Reduce the risk of developing certain types of cancer I love all my parts and plan to keep them in place.

-Increase insulin sensitivity, prevents type 2 diabetes Theres just nothing funny to say about diabetes…wanna doughnut?

-Reduce your level of anxiety and help you manage stress even if it does reduce my anxiety I still love xanex.

-Improve function of the immune system .. I wish I were immune to men..maybe this will help...
-Improve your self-esteem and restore confidence I am great, and kind, and beautiful and gosh darn it people like me.

-Help you sleep better, relax, and improve mood …Oh now when have I ever been in a bad mood..*Evil grin*

*Sigh* already hungry...

Almighty Heidi Drinking a skinny Latte'





1 comment:

foam said...

i had to google muffin top ..
i thought those were just called love handles .. :)

anyway ..
care to have a donut?