Dear Heidi,How should I deal with a chatty boss that seems to be much more interested in reminiscing about 30 years ago than actually getting work done?Signed,Too Young for this Conversation
This is posted by Erin who should be my editor, who has a very well written column at http://surfaceripple.blogspot.com/
Here is my dysfunctional answer:
My significant other is quite a bit older than I. He has a story for everything. Any conversation turns into a story of what he did, or would have done then supported by another story, most of whichI have heard already twice over. It is defiantly an old senile person thing, or being ungratified in the moment of life your are living in now. This is what you can do and it involves the scientific reasoning of your brain called the hypothalamus. Here is a quote (I must have a quote) on what I heard about it recently:
"The hypothalamus is one of the most important parts of the brain, involved in many kinds of motivation, among other functions. The hypothalamus controls the "Four F's":
fighting
feeding;
fleeing and
mating. "
1. Fighting: This is actually the nicer one of my suggestions.Fight back. How you may ask? When he talks of the days of latter years start doing very annoying things like tapping your pencil or leg while looking constantly at your watch. If this does not rid him then.. do something very mentally troubling such as taking a staple and scraping it along your cuticle until it bleeds,it will make him more and more unsettled.. If he throws a curve ball "Are you in a rush?" politely tell him you do have ALOT of work that needs to be done. "A Stanford research group advertised for participants in a study of obsessive-compulsive disorder. They were looking for therapy clients who had been diagnosed with this disorder. The response was gratifying; they got 3,000 responses about three days after the ad came out. All from the same person."
2. Feeding: Send him an anonymous cake lage enough for the entire staff "Happy Retirement" written on it. This will plant the seed that it maybe is time to take the memories of old to the nursing home he belongs in. If he doesn't get it, later that week anonymously send some flowers or put some champagne on his desk with the same slogan. He will wonder if he is truly going insane, or maybe just maybe someone does not like him.
If this does not work, pretend like you are eating your boogers or earwax while he is telling the stories. Then wipe your finger off on the desk area where he is closest too. Maybe this will gross him out enough to leave.
I have no quote for this one so I have a joke that I thought was funny that has absolutely nothing to do with your dilemma. "As she lay there dozing next to me, one voice inside my head kept saying, "Relax... You are not the first doctor to sleep with one of his patients, " but another kept reminding me, "Howard, you are a veterinarian."
Dick Wilson
3. Fleeing: If the more polite latter two do not work, this one has always worked for me. As he is starting to go into the story line, grap your closest roll of duck tape and scream in two short screams and a nice long curdeling one. Hurriedly and insanely tape his mouth screaming "SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE!" and then curl up under your desk rocking in the fetal position. This is a definite cure. People who never get carried away should be. - Malcolm Forbes
4. Mating: Umm...well he may have to find a mate to mate with so the present becomes more interesting than the past. Maybe you can purchase him one:) "Sex is one of the nine reasons for reincarnation... The other eight are unimportant. "
Henry Miller
So there is my dysfunctional advise to you: Be an obsessive compulsive, pick your boogies, go postal, and get him laid.
Now for my rebuttal to the "Lone Ranger":
"iF u dOnT LIKe tHEe wAy eye speLL, ThEn u dOnt got TO reeD mi BLOG"
Latte' Heidi
7/20/2005
Heidi The advice columnist begins...
"Researchers from Christchurch School of Medicine, New Zealand have found that smoking cannabis nearly doubles the risk of developing mental illness."
Drugs/Alcohol/Addictions
Triple Helix Spring 2005
I got my first question, for my dysfunctional advise column! Woohooo. Please feel free to ask any questions you'd like about anything and I will answer them all out of total dysfunction.
How goes the drug addiction? - Posted by Rainy Pete http://uselessmen.blogspot.com/
He has a great advise column and http://rainypete.blogspot.com/ his own personal column as well.
I am not sure how to answer this question. Should I be offended at the thought that he thinks that by my apparent issues that I am a drug user? Should I be offended and hurt. Should I stay in a state of silent frustration and shrug it off? Nope, I will try and get verbally even by lashing out and I will just remind him that he is funny looking, not right in the head, short, and mostly confused...and he wears a red rubber clown nose on his site:)
To answer his question the drug addiction is going well:) Too well in fact. I had hurt my back 4 weeks ago, the doc gave me percocet and flexeril. The flexeril made me feel like I had about 4 shots of goldschlogger. Mellow, yet my brain and mouth could no longer form words. Throughout the weeks I have gotten used to the meds, and would like a refill please. Really..Seriously I would like a refill please,that'ss some good stuff. The percocet did nothing for me so I never took it after the first day.
Words of advise from a dysfunction malfunction: 2 days before hurting my back I decided to go on a slim fast diet. I just wanted to lose a few pounds the jeans were getting tight. So I started that, and took my drugs all day long as the doc prescribed.Stupid me I was slosshed, but had an amazingly mellow day at work, nothing at all bothered me. I had a poker game later on in the evening, and I always have 2 drinks on poker night. Totally forgetting. Just not thinking....I had not eaten all day, just the stupid slim fast shake and flexeril, I drank. I was currently in 5th place (winner goes to the world poker tour). Needless to say I was bumped down to 19th, and un-understandable.
Slimfast+muscle relaxant+2 captain morgan and cokes make your world spin in a very bad way.
So tomorrow is the last day of meds...I truly could be addicted...but will continue my legal addiction of starbucks vanilla latte's...even though I know it must be loaded with crack or something because I try and find ways to do coffee runs for the office..every day...got a headache...you need coffee...bad day..yup you need coffee. Which leads me to my next addiction of a very bad, terrible ugly habit, that I am ashamed of...pen chewing. There is so much caffeinee floating around in my brain that I compulsivley chew my pen to no end, it really is disgusting,but it is a good way to keep the co-workers away from my pen "stash".
In conclusion it leads me to wonder:
If my mother did smoke pot or eat those little majuanna brownies when I was in the womb...
I smoke pot only three times in my life. The last was laced or something and I was hallucinating and first thought the cops were after me and then I thought that I was flashing my parents at the dinner table (and yes I was actually at the dinner table with them). Freud should figure that one out!
So I figure any mental illness I will pawn off on my parents of the 70's.
Pete, I hope this helps!
Latte'
Heidi
(p.s. I really do like the rubber nose, I am not sure if you are really short or not)
Drugs/Alcohol/Addictions
Triple Helix Spring 2005
I got my first question, for my dysfunctional advise column! Woohooo. Please feel free to ask any questions you'd like about anything and I will answer them all out of total dysfunction.
How goes the drug addiction? - Posted by Rainy Pete http://uselessmen.blogspot.com/
He has a great advise column and http://rainypete.blogspot.com/ his own personal column as well.
I am not sure how to answer this question. Should I be offended at the thought that he thinks that by my apparent issues that I am a drug user? Should I be offended and hurt. Should I stay in a state of silent frustration and shrug it off? Nope, I will try and get verbally even by lashing out and I will just remind him that he is funny looking, not right in the head, short, and mostly confused...and he wears a red rubber clown nose on his site:)
To answer his question the drug addiction is going well:) Too well in fact. I had hurt my back 4 weeks ago, the doc gave me percocet and flexeril. The flexeril made me feel like I had about 4 shots of goldschlogger. Mellow, yet my brain and mouth could no longer form words. Throughout the weeks I have gotten used to the meds, and would like a refill please. Really..Seriously I would like a refill please,that'ss some good stuff. The percocet did nothing for me so I never took it after the first day.
Words of advise from a dysfunction malfunction: 2 days before hurting my back I decided to go on a slim fast diet. I just wanted to lose a few pounds the jeans were getting tight. So I started that, and took my drugs all day long as the doc prescribed.Stupid me I was slosshed, but had an amazingly mellow day at work, nothing at all bothered me. I had a poker game later on in the evening, and I always have 2 drinks on poker night. Totally forgetting. Just not thinking....I had not eaten all day, just the stupid slim fast shake and flexeril, I drank. I was currently in 5th place (winner goes to the world poker tour). Needless to say I was bumped down to 19th, and un-understandable.
Slimfast+muscle relaxant+2 captain morgan and cokes make your world spin in a very bad way.
So tomorrow is the last day of meds...I truly could be addicted...but will continue my legal addiction of starbucks vanilla latte's...even though I know it must be loaded with crack or something because I try and find ways to do coffee runs for the office..every day...got a headache...you need coffee...bad day..yup you need coffee. Which leads me to my next addiction of a very bad, terrible ugly habit, that I am ashamed of...pen chewing. There is so much caffeinee floating around in my brain that I compulsivley chew my pen to no end, it really is disgusting,but it is a good way to keep the co-workers away from my pen "stash".
In conclusion it leads me to wonder:
If my mother did smoke pot or eat those little majuanna brownies when I was in the womb...
I smoke pot only three times in my life. The last was laced or something and I was hallucinating and first thought the cops were after me and then I thought that I was flashing my parents at the dinner table (and yes I was actually at the dinner table with them). Freud should figure that one out!
So I figure any mental illness I will pawn off on my parents of the 70's.
Pete, I hope this helps!
Latte'
Heidi
(p.s. I really do like the rubber nose, I am not sure if you are really short or not)
7/18/2005
Group Therapy
"A woman is the only thing I am afraid of that I know will not hurt me."
- Abe Lincoln
Oh my how the times have changed. Back in those days women still did not have a voice, not even a right to vote. I'm sure many women in silent frustration had baked their yummy little cakes and desserts for their hubbys with something of the equivelent to exlax, or cyanide.
On that note, I have decided to become a "dysfunctional" advice columnist. I have run out of things to post, so here is an open forum. You have an issue about love, dating, men, women, kids, jobs....I am here to help me help you.
Feel free to send any questions and I will answer each one of them.
- Abe Lincoln
Oh my how the times have changed. Back in those days women still did not have a voice, not even a right to vote. I'm sure many women in silent frustration had baked their yummy little cakes and desserts for their hubbys with something of the equivelent to exlax, or cyanide.
On that note, I have decided to become a "dysfunctional" advice columnist. I have run out of things to post, so here is an open forum. You have an issue about love, dating, men, women, kids, jobs....I am here to help me help you.
Feel free to send any questions and I will answer each one of them.
7/10/2005
Almighty Heidi- injured in combat
"The art of life is the art of avoiding pain." - Thomas Jefferson
I have not written because I am doped up on flexeril and percocet. My mouth and my brain no longer connect to make full distinguishable sentences. Why you asked? Let's just say I have possibly herniated a disk by going to war with my vacuum cleaner...And it won.
I have rigged up my alarm clock to set on the end of the bed post so I can press the snooze button in the morning with my big toe so I do not have to roll over and hit the button, thus sending an electrified jolt of pain in to my back, and into my ass. Bruce thinks I have lost my mind as he watches me rig up my incredible system, and says "Maybe you should lay off the percocet." I however think it is pure genius and want to make a patented alarm clock bed stand and toe friendly alarm clock. Then I have my PMS moment and think " Why am I doing this, why doesn't he press the snooze button in the morning. Why is the alarm clock on my side of the bed." I give him "the look" and he doesn't know why I am giving him "the look" and it makes me mad because he should be able to read my mind and understand the true dimensions of "the look"by now.
The worst of this whole thing was going to my doctor and getting weighed and telling the nurse "Your scale cannot possibly be calibrated right..." then the nurse...gives me "the look"
3 days of pain pills I go back to the gym to prove to everyone I am tough and can work through the pain, and no way am I going to turn into a fatty. 3 hours later the pills wore off, and I'm sulking on the couch like baby, and though a tearful confession I am 32 years old and yes I do want my mommy right about now.
Pathetic.
Latte'
Heidi
I have not written because I am doped up on flexeril and percocet. My mouth and my brain no longer connect to make full distinguishable sentences. Why you asked? Let's just say I have possibly herniated a disk by going to war with my vacuum cleaner...And it won.
I have rigged up my alarm clock to set on the end of the bed post so I can press the snooze button in the morning with my big toe so I do not have to roll over and hit the button, thus sending an electrified jolt of pain in to my back, and into my ass. Bruce thinks I have lost my mind as he watches me rig up my incredible system, and says "Maybe you should lay off the percocet." I however think it is pure genius and want to make a patented alarm clock bed stand and toe friendly alarm clock. Then I have my PMS moment and think " Why am I doing this, why doesn't he press the snooze button in the morning. Why is the alarm clock on my side of the bed." I give him "the look" and he doesn't know why I am giving him "the look" and it makes me mad because he should be able to read my mind and understand the true dimensions of "the look"by now.
The worst of this whole thing was going to my doctor and getting weighed and telling the nurse "Your scale cannot possibly be calibrated right..." then the nurse...gives me "the look"
3 days of pain pills I go back to the gym to prove to everyone I am tough and can work through the pain, and no way am I going to turn into a fatty. 3 hours later the pills wore off, and I'm sulking on the couch like baby, and though a tearful confession I am 32 years old and yes I do want my mommy right about now.
Pathetic.
Latte'
Heidi
6/28/2005
Martians
"There comes that mysterious meeting in life when someone acknowledges who we are and what we can be, igniting the circuits of our highest potential."
-Rusty Berkus
Today, I am pissed. In my office it is a golden rule that the reps go to lunch with the higher ups and bring back food for the ones lower on the chain. For the second time they have forgotten the lower downs that bust their ass for the company. Also today I finally get a filing cabinet that I have had to beg for, only because they happened to find one in the warehouse. The last few months I have brought in money that they otherwise would have not had. So instead of asking for appreciation I will ask for a raise.
I did looked up the meaning of "raise" to ponder how I would go about getting one, and make my points worthy and acceptable of the ever so deserving salary increase. Here is what I found.
Raise: (Verb): Comes from old English meaning more at rear. I think this is just about where I seem to be.
1. To cause or help to a standing position. I could try helping one of my co workers out of their chair, offering them a hand up...but they may look at me funny, but for a raise? ok.
2. Awaken, arouse or stir up. Ummm No. I am one of only 2 females in my work place, and arousing the males around here would be just plain gross. Although I would think considerably how much of a raise I would want. (I think I just threw up in my mouth)
3.To set upright by lifting or building, to place to a higher level of dignity
to get together for a purpose. I did build mighty impressive paperclip tower last week. Really.
4.Grow or cultivate . This one was easy. I do have a nasty habit of forgetting to wash out coffe cups, and leave them in my cubicle, untill one day I grap one and find a thick fuzzy layer of mold and fungus on top. This is a gift.
5. To give rise to; provoke. I am hoping that the "give rise to" doesn't apply to #2.
6. to bring up for consideration style. Duh, that's what I am trying to do here.
7. Increase in strength, intensity or pitch. I have invented my own cubicle areobics. My whining for office supplies has grown into a higher pitched annoying nagging sound.
8.to make light and porous. Umm I dunno about this one., but I do have pores if that counts.
9. to cause to ascend. I have an excel spreadsheet that does this for me.
10.to multiply itself a number of times. All women know how to do this.
11. to bring in sight by approaching. Yes, the cubicle does come into sight upon approaching from all angles.
12.to cause (as a blister) to form on the skin. I am not sure about blisters, but I have had monster paper cuts form on the skin. This should count.
13. to increase the nominal value of fraudulently. This would be an example of the VP of the company. He knows all sorts of stuff about fraud.
14. to articulate a sound with the tonge in a higher position. Ok, here goes my articulating I....WANT....A.....RAISE
Latte'
Heidi
-Rusty Berkus
Today, I am pissed. In my office it is a golden rule that the reps go to lunch with the higher ups and bring back food for the ones lower on the chain. For the second time they have forgotten the lower downs that bust their ass for the company. Also today I finally get a filing cabinet that I have had to beg for, only because they happened to find one in the warehouse. The last few months I have brought in money that they otherwise would have not had. So instead of asking for appreciation I will ask for a raise.
I did looked up the meaning of "raise" to ponder how I would go about getting one, and make my points worthy and acceptable of the ever so deserving salary increase. Here is what I found.
Raise: (Verb): Comes from old English meaning more at rear. I think this is just about where I seem to be.
1. To cause or help to a standing position. I could try helping one of my co workers out of their chair, offering them a hand up...but they may look at me funny, but for a raise? ok.
2. Awaken, arouse or stir up. Ummm No. I am one of only 2 females in my work place, and arousing the males around here would be just plain gross. Although I would think considerably how much of a raise I would want. (I think I just threw up in my mouth)
3.To set upright by lifting or building, to place to a higher level of dignity
to get together for a purpose. I did build mighty impressive paperclip tower last week. Really.
4.Grow or cultivate . This one was easy. I do have a nasty habit of forgetting to wash out coffe cups, and leave them in my cubicle, untill one day I grap one and find a thick fuzzy layer of mold and fungus on top. This is a gift.
5. To give rise to; provoke. I am hoping that the "give rise to" doesn't apply to #2.
6. to bring up for consideration style. Duh, that's what I am trying to do here.
7. Increase in strength, intensity or pitch. I have invented my own cubicle areobics. My whining for office supplies has grown into a higher pitched annoying nagging sound.
8.to make light and porous. Umm I dunno about this one., but I do have pores if that counts.
9. to cause to ascend. I have an excel spreadsheet that does this for me.
10.to multiply itself a number of times. All women know how to do this.
11. to bring in sight by approaching. Yes, the cubicle does come into sight upon approaching from all angles.
12.to cause (as a blister) to form on the skin. I am not sure about blisters, but I have had monster paper cuts form on the skin. This should count.
13. to increase the nominal value of fraudulently. This would be an example of the VP of the company. He knows all sorts of stuff about fraud.
14. to articulate a sound with the tonge in a higher position. Ok, here goes my articulating I....WANT....A.....RAISE
Latte'
Heidi
6/27/2005
The Alien Child
I was reading one of my favorite blogs now written by a kid in Chicago: http://thecasualfriday.blogspot.com/ he speaks of his life yet again saved by living inland, and having the threat of being eaten by a shark in Florida on one of his "highlights"Which brings me to my next blogging adventure,
When a man has pity on all living creatures then only is he noble.The Buddha (6th cent BCE).
My son was "double dog dared" in summer camp to eat an ant. In Florida, it is not just an ant. We have the meanest biggest horrible fire ants that god could possibly create. He was also offered 5 dollars so of course he had to accept the dare, and the money.
Needless to say the ant bit him hard on the tongue and my son suffered some excruciating pain of Friday. It is now Monday and his tongue still burns.
Would I have done this...Umm...yeah, seeing as Becky across the street in third grade dared me to stick my tongue to her freezer door and I ripped off three layers of skin.
Also in Florida we do have big giant gators which rule the ponds and lakes. People water ski regularly here...I tried once, and a fish brushed across my leg and I screemed bloody murder to get out of the water, swearing it was a 20 ft. Gator coming to eat me for lunch. NEVER AGAIN!
I do not have pity on the living creatures in Florida. We have the biggest cockroaches known to the living man. We have mosquitoes that pass on viruses, and sharks that love dangling legs on boogie boards.
If you can fathom this, Florida ia a great place to live regardless. Just have a big can of RAID handy!
When a man has pity on all living creatures then only is he noble.The Buddha (6th cent BCE).
My son was "double dog dared" in summer camp to eat an ant. In Florida, it is not just an ant. We have the meanest biggest horrible fire ants that god could possibly create. He was also offered 5 dollars so of course he had to accept the dare, and the money.
Needless to say the ant bit him hard on the tongue and my son suffered some excruciating pain of Friday. It is now Monday and his tongue still burns.
Would I have done this...Umm...yeah, seeing as Becky across the street in third grade dared me to stick my tongue to her freezer door and I ripped off three layers of skin.
Also in Florida we do have big giant gators which rule the ponds and lakes. People water ski regularly here...I tried once, and a fish brushed across my leg and I screemed bloody murder to get out of the water, swearing it was a 20 ft. Gator coming to eat me for lunch. NEVER AGAIN!
I do not have pity on the living creatures in Florida. We have the biggest cockroaches known to the living man. We have mosquitoes that pass on viruses, and sharks that love dangling legs on boogie boards.
If you can fathom this, Florida ia a great place to live regardless. Just have a big can of RAID handy!
6/26/2005
"The Mothership" speaks out
I got this idea from another blog I visited. There is no creativity left in my body whatsoever today, so, I will breakdown the weeks highlights.
But first as always the quote of the day, which idea I stole from my brothers blog.
"Work is the curse of the drinking classes."
Oscar Wilde
1. Started and ended a diet this week. Check out the new link.
2. I blame the diet not working on my job. The short staffed crazyness going on has left me contemplating starting a crack habit, drinking very heavily, or lying under the fetal position underneath my desk, but again as in my earlier blog I looked under the desk and saw that my toenails needed to be painted and that moment passsed. It is a good thing my cubicle is padded, all I need is a straight jacket to match.
3. I played poker with Tommy, he is an old friend of B's, who is about 70. He is always trying to touch me inappropriatly, and lets me know that he does not "get any" and he enjoys porn. OH MY GOD.
4.After having a horrible work week, I decide I will go to get my hair cut and colored. I desrve it. So I go to see "Tim" again who is a short chineese guy, who gets out his ginsu knives and ...chop chop chop...wahhhhhh, it's done. My hair is supposed to be dark brown, and it is jet black. I wante an inch off, he took three. It took me 6 months to grow out, I was feeling really sexy before, now...there are no words, which lead me to the big bowl of mint chocolate chip ice cream, and Kleenex. The ultimate sad thing is B did not even notice. I suppose that is a good thing, but sometimes I must hit the man over the head to get any attention.
5. B invites me to back and play poker, I am mad he did not notice the hair, and I don't feel like being felt up by the old guy.
6. I never do paint my toenails
7. We have had a frog living in our toilet for the past year, since the hurricaines. I heard him come through the pipes, and he made himself a new pond. As of late he has made himself friendly and is on the shower curtain as I shower each morning. Why you ask "Havent we just gotten rid of the frog??" Well, we let him go once and he made his way back into our home. I think he likes watching me shower, it is the closest to male attention I have recived in a long time. I bet he would have noticed the hair color. He sits on the counter every evening as I brush my teeth, and get ready for work in the morning. It is the strangest thing, and please don't ask me what he eats, he does, after all live in a toilet.
I told him last night he must go back to his frog friends. Living in a toilet is no place for him. So we gather him up and take him outside, where he refuses to leave the tupperware bowl we have put him in.
This morning he was gone. I suppose he was the closest thing to a pet we have ever had. Although my daughter refuses to let me kill a daddy long legs she has in the corner of her room. She calls it "Phil"
8. Kayla is gone to her dads this weekend. "Phil" may have a tragic accident.
9. I ran my first red light.
10. I really want B to call my work tommorrow to tell them that "Yes, she has been abducted by aliens" so I can go lie on the beach somewhere in peaceful solitude..but I don't think they will buy it.
Latte'
Heidi
But first as always the quote of the day, which idea I stole from my brothers blog.
"Work is the curse of the drinking classes."
Oscar Wilde
1. Started and ended a diet this week. Check out the new link.
2. I blame the diet not working on my job. The short staffed crazyness going on has left me contemplating starting a crack habit, drinking very heavily, or lying under the fetal position underneath my desk, but again as in my earlier blog I looked under the desk and saw that my toenails needed to be painted and that moment passsed. It is a good thing my cubicle is padded, all I need is a straight jacket to match.
3. I played poker with Tommy, he is an old friend of B's, who is about 70. He is always trying to touch me inappropriatly, and lets me know that he does not "get any" and he enjoys porn. OH MY GOD.
4.After having a horrible work week, I decide I will go to get my hair cut and colored. I desrve it. So I go to see "Tim" again who is a short chineese guy, who gets out his ginsu knives and ...chop chop chop...wahhhhhh, it's done. My hair is supposed to be dark brown, and it is jet black. I wante an inch off, he took three. It took me 6 months to grow out, I was feeling really sexy before, now...there are no words, which lead me to the big bowl of mint chocolate chip ice cream, and Kleenex. The ultimate sad thing is B did not even notice. I suppose that is a good thing, but sometimes I must hit the man over the head to get any attention.
5. B invites me to back and play poker, I am mad he did not notice the hair, and I don't feel like being felt up by the old guy.
6. I never do paint my toenails
7. We have had a frog living in our toilet for the past year, since the hurricaines. I heard him come through the pipes, and he made himself a new pond. As of late he has made himself friendly and is on the shower curtain as I shower each morning. Why you ask "Havent we just gotten rid of the frog??" Well, we let him go once and he made his way back into our home. I think he likes watching me shower, it is the closest to male attention I have recived in a long time. I bet he would have noticed the hair color. He sits on the counter every evening as I brush my teeth, and get ready for work in the morning. It is the strangest thing, and please don't ask me what he eats, he does, after all live in a toilet.
I told him last night he must go back to his frog friends. Living in a toilet is no place for him. So we gather him up and take him outside, where he refuses to leave the tupperware bowl we have put him in.
This morning he was gone. I suppose he was the closest thing to a pet we have ever had. Although my daughter refuses to let me kill a daddy long legs she has in the corner of her room. She calls it "Phil"
8. Kayla is gone to her dads this weekend. "Phil" may have a tragic accident.
9. I ran my first red light.
10. I really want B to call my work tommorrow to tell them that "Yes, she has been abducted by aliens" so I can go lie on the beach somewhere in peaceful solitude..but I don't think they will buy it.
Latte'
Heidi
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